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Man Long VIX Really Really Hoping Something Bad Happens and Soon

Madison, WI – Local investor and doomsday prepper Larry Stotts has been speculating in the markets for years while also accumulating the supplies required to comfortably live after a major natural disaster hits the continental United States, or a nuclear bomb is dropped on the country by a foreign adversary.

His next big play to profit from what he believes is merely an inevitability was to go long the volatility index or VIX which rises as people get increasingly nervous. When the Covid pandemic started it went from $20 to almost $90 in a very short period.

“Something bad is going to happen,” says Stotts from an undisclosed location. “The writing is on the wall. All I’m hoping is that it happens sooner than later as I bought a bunch of April VIX call options.”

While it’s unclear if the exchanges will still settle those contracts in a nuclear winter scenario where everyone is left to fend for themselves and the idea of money becomes unnecessary, Stotts remains hopeful.

“You don’t think I’ve thought of that?” says an agitated Stotts. “I know that I might have some problems withdrawing my cash from a bank if there aren’t any banks left. That’s why I’ve hidden gold all over the place. In the event that becomes the new world currency I’ll be wealth beyond my wildest imagination.”

It’s also unclear why people will want gold or how they will even be able to transact in the clunky metal when food and water will be so scarce. From photos it looks like Stotts has an impressive weapons arsenal which should all but guarantee him survival until someone with more or bigger guns relieves him of his possessions.