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Super-Powered AI Trading Assistant Just Keeps Recommending Uninstalling Robinhood

An AI trading assistant developed by a research team at Stanford’s School of Engineering has run into some issues during its beta testing phase. The program, designed to help day traders make smarter decisions, keeps uninstalling each user’s brokerage app.

“We optimized the system to make the best decisions to optimize profit and avoid losses,” says Rachel Gordon, a researcher working on the program. “We gave the system very few parameters to work within, hoping that it would optimize itself. Unfortunately, we may have given it a little too much room to work, as it has repeatedly decided to uninstall users’ brokerage apps.”

Numerous beta testers noticed that each time they attempted to short Tesla or enter a complicated options trade they didn’t understand, the system would suddenly crash.

“It became frustrating. Everytime I tried to make a trade, my brokerage app would force quite and would get uninstalled,” said Colton Reynolds, a 19-year old amateur trader.

Reynolds did note, however, that his first month with the AI trading bot was his most profitable trading month ever, with a return of -2.91%. Trading on his own, Reynolds had achieved losses of at least 10% in every other month.

“We will continue studying this issue,” said Gordon. “However, we may just have a selection problem within our testing group. None of these idiots seem to know how to trade properly.”