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Tesla Stock Rebounds After Musk Announces Exploding Cars “Supposed to Do That”

“Listen – that’s just what cars do in the future, okay? Cars are just like that.” said Tesla CEO Elon Musk in a press conference Thursday. This comes in the wake of several reports of severe battery failure in Tesla’s new Model Y, causing the cars to explode. Musk further explained that he “knows future shit better than anyone” and went on to refer to himself confusingly as “the white Thomas Edison.”

The announcement was met with a great deal of support on social media, with many praising the company’s commitment to innovation. “It’s just like Apple getting rid of the headphone jack – they give us what we want, before we even know we want it!” said one Reddit user.

In a poll conducted of 1,000 Tesla owners, 98% reported feeling “very favorable” toward the company following Musk’s statement. The remaining 2% were killed when their cars blew up on the road, but it’s safe to assume they’d have shared the sentiment.

This outpouring of support likely contributed to $TSLA rebounding from its low of $539.49 last week and trading up to over $700, with experts saying there’s more to come. “This spells very good things for the future of the company,” said Bloomberg market analyst Gung Bulbin. “I mean, you heard what [Musk] said, [he] knows future shit better than anyone.”

A downloadable update for the Model Y has been made available for those who want to opt-in to the combustible battery feature.